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Take a hungry dog and a master with a naughty sense of humour, and this is what you get.
- Food, you know, I just couldn't stop thinking about it.
- So, yea. So, you know, I went to the fridge and I opened up the meat drawer. You know what the meat drawer is, right?
- Yea. What was in there?
- Well, I'll tell you what was in there. You know that bacon that's like maple? It's got maple flavour.
- The maple kind, yea.
- Yea, so.
- I took that out and I thought...
- ... I know who would like that... Me! So I ate it.
- Aaaaw, no! You're kidding me.
- Nope! I'm not kidding. You know, I also noticed there was some beef in there. Yea, you know, a steak, you know, juicy. Well, I ate that too.
- But I went back to the fridge... just a few minutes ago, and I put something together really special, you're gonna love this one. I took some chicken...
- I put some, yea, I put some cheese on it, and I covered it with...
- Covered it with what?
- I covered it with cat treats.
- Then, guess what.
- I gave it to the cat.
- Aaaaugh! ho ho- ho.
,YOU KNOW,= In conversation, we often use this friend as a gap-filler. It means nothing, it simply gives us two extra seconds to think about what to say next. You can find many of these in this conversation (and in many conversations).
STOP + -ing= Stop an action, cease doing it, finish an action.
- Stop watching the TV and listen to me when I'm talking!
- You have to stop robbing banks or you will be arrested and sent to prison.
STOP + to= Finish an action to do something different.
- When the phone rang, he stopped watching football to answer the phone.
- He was working hard all day, but in the afternoon he stopped to have a rest for a couple of hours.
YEA= (coll. also spelled "yeah") Yes.
-FRIDGE= Refrigerator (the electric cupboard in the kitchen where you keep things cold).
OPENED UP= Opened completely.
DRAWER= (see picture).
MAPLE= The flavour of the concentrated sap of the sugar maple. A maple tree is a kind of tree very common in north America. A maple tree leaf is on the flag of Canada. (see picture)
KIDDING= To kid someone is to tease or deceive for fun, to fool someone. So when you say "you're kidding me!" it means "I don't believe you", or "that can't be true!", or "are you serious?".
NOPE= (coll.) No (the opposite is "yup"= yes)
NOTICED= When you notice something, you perceive it with your senses (you see it or smell it or touch it, etc).
BEEF= The meat of a cow.
STEAK= /steɪk/ A thin and flat piece of meat (see picture)
GONNA= (coll.) going to.
TREATS= Special delicious food.
GUESS WHAT= You know what? Do you want to know? (we say it when we want to create expectation and get our listener curious and interested in what we are saying. The listener is supposed to say "what?" before we continue).
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