- Trick or treat?
- You missed it, kid. Halloween was last night.
- Trick or treat.
- Are you kidding?
- Trick or treat.
- I don't have any candy. Go home.
- Don't you get it?, this isn't funny. Where are your parents? Are you ok? Come on inside. What's your phone number?
- Treat!
- You're not going to get your treat unless you tell me what your phone number is.
- No treats, then tricks.
- You little sh***. Get over here. That is it. I have tried to be nice to you. I'm calling the police. Your parents are gonna kick your ass. Yes, Mrs. Doyle Richards. I live at 943 Figaro Terrace. Yea, there's an intruder in my house... No, no, no, it's a kid... He wants- he thinks he's trick-or-treating or something, I don't know... He might have some kind of mental condition... Look, can you send somebody over to pick him up, please... I'll try and get to hold him... He's running round the house, he wants candy... I don't have any candy! Stop it.
- I wanna treat.
- No, you're not gonna get a treat, do you hear me? Close my drawer, I want you out of... Put that down. Ok, whatever you want, I'm going to the store. Just put the knife down, ok?
- No treats?
- Oh, sh***
- Trick or treat. Gimme something good to eat.
- Hey kid, I gotta treat for you.
- Where is it?
- It's in here. I just found it.
- You have to come in and get it though. Come on, ++++ up the door, then you can come in. This treat tastes really good.
- Where are you?
- Gotcha! There's a treat. You wanna go for a ride?
- No, let me out. Sorry honey, there we go.
- How d'you like that one, huh? That was some treat, wasn't it? Yea?
- That was not a treat.
- Well, maybe we can find you another treat, come on. Here, this one is gonna be really tasty. Oh my God. Thank God.
- ++++, ma'am.
- Come on in, officer.
- So, what seems to be the trouble, ma'am?
- This kid, he came into my house and he took an egg and he smashed me in my face and then he- he took a knife and he stabbed me in my leg. And he ran around the house and he finally, I- I took a comforter and threw it over him.
- Excuse me, ma'am.
- No, don't let him go, you idi-
- Now, ma'am.
- He is a horrible monster!
- Calm down. I'll go upstairs and I'll get him. Are you all by yourself this evening? Anybody's in the house?
- No, my- my roommates are all out of town.
- Good.
- What are you doing?
- Eating.
- That was a yummy treat!